I dont think people realize what its like to just fucking hate everything. The fact that anything you look at, even things you like, you just look at it and there's that subtle feeling of disdain and bitterness. The feeling of frustration that comes from all that. I just can't put up with it. I'm losing my fucking mind. I just feel like nobody relates. Nobody really thinks the same way I do. Nobody has ever agreed with me. they just nod the head and agree. nobody gets that im so frustrated with things that i have nothing else to do but hit myself on the head and cry and hope that some day ill wake up and ill have a completely new outlook on things or that ill have finally made myself dumb enough to just be fucking happy and content with everything around me for no fucking reason. im just really upset and frustrated and nobody wants to talk about it or help me and frankly i think its better for everyone if that stays that way. i dont even know why im writing this, i guess i just get comfort knowing its not as insane as talking to myself. i dont know if its good or bad that i pour myself out so much. probably bad. people frown upon that kind of thing. nobody wants to hear about me. what the fuck did i ever do except be an ass and complain, right? its not like i dont understand why nobody talks to me. i get it. you're completely right. i guess thats where some of this comes from, the fact that i know everyone is right. i just dont even know what to do anymore. i spend most of my time trying to occupy myself so i feel happy for a bit. never works for very long.